The Feeling Of Loneliness
by Eternal Grey
Summary: Sakura saw Kiba and knew she had to have him. Ino and him are in love but that doesn't matter. She needs to get rid of her loneliness. Her power as a Haruno gives her the right to have him. A waiter keeps showing up and helping her. SakuKiba SakuSaso
1. Chapter 1

"…_Just go and leave me alone!" I shouted angrily thrusting my arm out violently causing Kiba to take a step back with a face full of bitter understanding._

I never wanted to lose. Staring at the boy across the room a light blush covered my face. I stared at Kiba Inuzuka in shock. He's the most handsome boy I've ever seen and I want him. I turned to my parents but they were already walking over to his.

"You'll never get him…" Ino whispered with a smirk. I wanted to hit her but instead I just smiled wanting to defeat her so bad that she would never show her face to me ever again. I turned to Ino and gave her a sweet innocent smile.

"Just watch me." I said with a defiant and confident look. She glared but also looked jealous and scared. She must truly love him… I thrust this thought out of my mind and walked up to him. I was at yet another fancy and privileged party. In fact, this is my birthday party. I'm officially fifteen years old.

I stared at Kiba's confused face and then watched him smile softly at me. "Are you having a fun birthday party?" He asked with a pleased expression. This made me want to melt right then and there but instead I just turned to give him a sly smile.

"Now that I've talked to you." I answered causing the boy to smile wider. For some reason this didn't feel real to me. I've been all alone for so long and here I am worrying about whether or not my feelings are accurate along with his.

His parents walked up and began pulling him away, whispering something in his ear. "I'm sorry but can I talk to you again later?" He called back to me with a worried look on his face. I smiled warmly at him and nodded.

"I'll be waiting!" I replied feeling something within me. I realized instantly that it was hope. I was hoping that he would get rid of the loneliness within me. Chills ran down my spine along with the pain of being all alone. I've never had anyone who truly knows me. I immediately decided that I would entrust Kiba with my entire personality and let him know me.

That's so much to thrust on someone, but I'm a selfish person. I can't help it. I need him to be the one that understands me completely if not… I could feel it building up once again. No one here knows a thing about me. My parents only knew I was interested in Kiba because I was staring at him. No one truly knows me.

"Are you alright?" A waiter asked me gently. I turned to see a boy with messy deep red hair and light orange eyes. I glared at him then stalked off feeling my face begin to heat up. I need to find a way to release all this loneliness within me.

I began reading romance novels immediately. That was the only way I could figure on protecting myself from these stupid feelings that take over me so often. Once I get into a book or a series I become passionate and obsessive over a character. It helps me forget the world.

The rest of the party went on and no one disturbed me. I had the rude waiter watching out for Kiba but apparently he didn't return. This was just as well. I wouldn't want to talk to him when my feelings were so close to the surface.

The next day I woke up to see a note from my parents on my night stand. I read over it quickly making my eyes widen in shock. Kiba would be coming over today to see and spend time with me. I cheered ecstatically and then glanced over at the picture of me and Ino across the room. I didn't want to hide it but it also expressed something I didn't want Kiba to believe.

After I was done getting ready he walked in looking happy as he smiled at me. I looked over at him mischievously and smirked. "I know you wanted to talk to me again but isn't this a bit much?" I asked him making the boy laugh then glance over at the picture of me and Ino.

We were eight punching our fists into the air. That was back when we were friends and competed with each other out of fun. Now it's different. Somewhere along the way we changed and now hate one another. "You and Ino are friends?" He asked and I could tell he was much more interested then he should be if he's visiting me.

"No. We used to be but we aren't anymore." I said softly not wanting the conversation to continue to go on about _her_. Kiba looked a bit disappointed but said nothing. I didn't want him to like her. He needs to care for _me_ only.

"You are very beautiful." He informed me with his kind smile. The smile that I knew would help to erase my loneliness. I blushed lightly and stared up at him in shock noticing how he was looking at the picture of Ino and I. Some part of me told me that he was looking at Ino but I shut that part up.

"I want you to be here with me forever." I informed him standing up to face the boy. He turned and looked at me in shock as the waiter from last night came in and dropped off some tea and snicker doodle cookies. He glanced at us both and then left.

Kiba stared at me with wide eyes and then smiled softly and took both my hands. "Of course, I'll do anything you ask of me. Thank you so much Sakura." He said with such a kind yet bitter smile. I hugged him to me tightly unwilling to let go… to let go and face the truth.


	2. Chapter 2

"_I love you Sakura." Kiba smiled holding my hand tightly. I looked up at him and knew he was lying._

I held Kiba's hand and walked with him through the crowded streets. My parents informed me that his own family does not mind answering any request I have for Kiba. If they do not then my family will crush his. Since I'm the heir of the Haruno Company then they must please me.

"I love you." I told him with a soft expression. He looked down on me and forced a smile. This made my blood run cold but I pretended like I didn't notice. "We should go into that store!" I grinned pointing to a game place. His eyes widened and a slow smile crept over his face. I've found a way to make him happy.

We played all the games in the arcade several times over before finally leaving. He had a satisfied smile on his face then grabbed my hand and began running through the crowded streets. I looked at him in shock and then smiled softly. He's trying _so_ hard for me…

He stopped us in front of a wrestling gym and pulled me inside. I stared at the room around me in amazement and then glanced over at the waiter who works for me at home in here fighting a blond haired boy whose hair had to be down to his waist. When he noticed me the boy stared but I just turned to Kiba in curiosity.

"What did you bring me here for?" I asked him then Kiba smirked and showed me to a ring. A tough looking man was waiting inside. That's when I began to understand. Kiba wrapped his arms around my waist then leaned forward so his lips were at my ear.

"You love fighting and you're better than many pro wrestlers. Have some fun and beat that arrogant fighter up." He whispered. I smiled at this then jumped into the rings. The man looked at me with a cocky expression and crossed his arms.

"What do you want little lady?" he asked causing me to smirk at him. I took my fighting stance making the man laugh at me before beginning to take his fighting stance as well. I ran up to him and lifted the man up tossing him across the ring into the hard rubber wires. The man glared at me then ran forward but I dodged easily and punched him in the gut.

"This has been fun." I said softly as the man fell to the ground in pain. "But you're too weak for my taste." I ended and turned to Kiba. Instantly the waiter ran forward joining me in the ring and punched someone behind me. Apparently I underestimated the man. He wasn't quite finished.

"Hey Sasori, get back here yeah! What are you doing running away in the middle of our fight, un?!" His blond friend cried. I stared at him with wide eyes and then jumped down from the ring to Kiba. He stared at me with an amazed expression and then wrapped an arm around my shoulders.

"I had fun today." I told him softly making him smile and nod.

"Yea me too." He answered and held me tighter. I could hear that sad edge to his voice and feel the pain he was trying to hide. I stared up at him sadly wishing he could just be with me rather than allowing Ino to join in within the man's thoughts.

"Let's do it again sometime!" I cheered punching my fist into the air before giving him my number. We both have unlimited calls and text. This will be easy enough to contact one another.

"Most definitely." He answered and turned to go. I watched him leave with his back to me and felt the distance between us grow. Instantly I ran forward and hugged him from behind as tight as I could feeling the tears fill up.

"Please don't leave me all alone…" I whispered blinking away the tears the best I could. He turned his head to look back at me and then faced me running his fingers through my hair.

"Don't worry. I'll never leave you unless you want me to." He murmured and kissed the top of my head. I stared up at him and then burst into tears holding him tighter to me. There's no way I'll ever let him go! He's the only one in this world who can be here for me! He's the only one who can fight away my loneliness!

"I'll never want you to go away…" I growled and felt his body tense for a moment. I tried my best to ignore it and pretend like he really is here for me and me alone. The pain of being all alone filled me up again but before I could say or do anything else he carried me like I was a princess and began walking me home.

"What are you doing?!" I cried masking my pain. He just smiled down at me and kissed my forehead. My eyes widened at this then I blinked in surprise.

"I could tell you were becoming lonely and I hate that. You need to get home and I don't want you to have to worry about a thing. I'm here for you." He grinned and held me tighter in his arms. I looked up at him like a child looking up at someone special to them.

"You're my special someone… please stay with me forever." I muttered with a pout knowing how bratty and selfish I sound. He just smirked and looked down at me once again.

"Don't worry. I'll stay here as long as you want me to. You're the most amazing girl I've ever met! I hope I can stay with you for as long as possible." Kiba informed me and then dropped me off in front of my house. I smiled at this then watched him go.

For some reason this time his back seemed to hurt even worse than before.


	3. Chapter 3

I was sick. This was obvious in my temperature, coughing, and sneezing. Still… I told Kiba to come over today. That was our deal and we're sticking to it, no matter what. I didn't tell him I was sick so when he arrived in my room he blinked at me in surprise with a questioning look in his eyes.

The maids, butlers, and chefs gave me three buttons I can press whenever I need anything… but I need someone not a button. I need someone to stay by my side and tell me everything will be okay. I've needed someone like that since I got my first taste of loneliness.

"Please… please stay and take care of me." I whispered and held out my hand weakly. The waiter from the party comes in from time to time and just sits by my side watching over me, but then he'll leave seven minutes later with a shake of his head and a sigh.

Kiba looked down at me and smiled tiredly. I could tell he didn't want to do this but I was too sick to care. I need someone to be here with me or I'll die of loneliness. "I'm here for you always." He whispered and placed a wet cloth on my forehead.

I smiled softly at this and breathed in and out trying to make this moment last forever. Kiba held my hand and looked at me with a look of regret and bitterness. I pretended it was a look of love. "I'm so glad you can be here with me." I grinned and began to cough.

He watched without a word and then replied. "I'm here for you just like how you wanted. That makes me safe right?" I looked at him curiously not quite understanding but then I began to sneeze. He let go of my hand and ran a hand through my hair just as the waiter from before walked in.

"Ah… Ms. Haruno I brought you more Kleenex and some orange juice to help you feel better." He said and set them down by my bedside. Just as he turned to leave I stopped him.

"What's your name?" I asked wanting to thank him properly.

"Sasori." He answered abruptly with a sly smile.

"Thank you so much for all you've done for me today." I said with a warm look and kind eyes. I then began coughing again. I noticed Sasori hand a cough drop bag to Kiba who nodded and looked at me with concern.

"Here… take one." Kiba murmured handing me a cough drop. I nodded and began to suck on it while still coughing. "It'll take a minute but hold on until then and try to relax." I watched Sasori leave and held onto Kiba's hand.

"I-I hate this." I whispered and closed my eyes tightly. Tears slid down my cheeks as slow as possible. My entire body felt as though it would collapse under the pain of my emotions and stress of my sickness. I held onto Kiba's hand with both of mine then and began to cling tightly.

I sobbed then and wept for all the world to see. A snotty nose was wiped away by Kiba's other hand as I continued to cry unable to stop. This feels so fake! I want him to look at me as though he was really looking at me, not at Ino! He continued to stroke my hair completely oblivious to my thoughts about him. "Why… why are you by my side?" I asked slowly looking up at him with my tear filled eyes. He looked down at me with an emotionless expression and sighed.

"I was beginning to think you didn't know." Kiba said with a bitter laugh. "Your parents will destroy my family's business if I ever make you unhappy or reject you. I have to always make you happy or else it'll all end." He whispered and looked at me deep in my eyes.

Tears filled once again as I looked at him straight in the eyes. "Go. I'll call you later to meet up again but until then… just go." I growled and watched as he left without a second thought or hesitation. I watched him go and then wiped my eyes and put on sensible clothes. It didn't look like I was sick at all by the time I was done.

I need to get out of here now. I walked over to the window and climbed down, avoiding doing it in front of or in view of windows. When I was in the back courtyard I climbed the wall and jumped down on the other side then began to take a walk to clear my head.

"What's wrong?" A voice asked from behind me. I turned to see Sasori and ignored him while continuing on my walk.

I'm too humiliated. Instantly I caught something that he had tossed at me. It was Advil. I smiled at this and plopped a pill in my mouth and swallowed. "Thanks." I said without thinking. He was beside me in an instantly with his hand on my forehead.

"It should go down soon." He said softly. I nodded and continued to walk through the park. My entire body felt weak but I continued to press through it. Just because I'm sick doesn't mean I should let myself stop. If I do stop then I'll just huddle in a ball and cry.

"Why are you here?" I asked him and kicked a rock to the side. My hands were in my pockets with my thumbs out and I was breathing a little hard but I was able to focus on him.

"I'm here as a friend, or rather as a wannabe friend." He smirked and took my hand. I glanced down at the contact and slid my hand out of his, holding it against my chest. "Did something happen between you and that kid?" He asked.

"No. Nothing ever did." I whispered and fell into his arms into the darkness of sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

_Maybe I just… no this wasn't my fault. I pursued a man who could care less and now I have to deal with that._

This will be the last date we go on together before we either marry or see other people. He took my hand and looked down at me with his warm dark eyes. "I love you Sakura." Kiba smiled holding my hand tightly. I looked up at him and knew he was lying. I smiled though and played the dumb string along.

We were in a park with strung up lights and a carnival at the center. I was wearing a pale orange dress that ended at my knees with white flats and a white knitted coat that hung on me loosely. Kiba was wearing a brown tux with no tie and a white long sleeve shirt under it.

The two of us looked like the perfect couple, as he held my arm in his. It felt nice being with someone like this. My happiness on my face and actions slowly became real. All I wanted was just to have someone there for me. I knew our time was short together and yet I already desire more and more. I want to get rid of my memories of pain and loneliness. I want to take hold of something real.

Is this even possible for someone like me?

Perhaps not but I'll continue to long for it. I want to taste it on my tongue and feel it on my flesh. The joy of being _with_ someone and not just being a lie, this is all I want. Is that too much to ask? Will the universe reject me once again and force me into the humiliation of realizing it was just a fake. How sad and cruel can the universe be?

Tears built up in my eyes but I blinked them away and ran for the roller coasters with a laugh and large smile. He didn't notice how sad I was and I liked it that way. For some reason I don't care anymore. I almost want to marry him that way I can force him into a life with me forever. A life he'd hate.

I want to drag him down and make the boy beg for me. If I could just take over his entire being and force him to be mine… then wouldn't he grow to love me after years of confinement? This is what I want and yet I can't do that. Dragging him into my dungeon of darkness that fills my soul with such cruel thoughts… this is what I want right?

He smiled at me and then took my hand bringing me into the tea cup. I looked up at his warm smile and dark cool eyes. I realized then that I don't want to do him harm. A boy who will try his best to make me happy and destroy his own in return… he deserves my respect.

He and I both spun the twirler the fastest we could and laughed the whole time. It seemed like we were in another world as we bumped shoulders and kissed each other. The kisses were soft pecks at first but then turned into slow sensual strokes of the tongue and urgency of the lips.

"I love you so much." He whispered. I could tell he was being sincere but when I opened my half closed eyes to look at him… I could tell he wasn't looking at me.

Pain pulsed through my entire body. A sharp, stinging, ache that wanted to tear me to shreds, this very feeling filled me with loneliness. I wanted to cry but instead I just smiled at him and led the boy to the Ferris wheel.

"We're riding this next?" He asked with slight amusement and bought me a dark brown cap. I smiled warmly up at him and accepted it even though I wanted to cry and scream. We got into the cart and sat down. I looked outside at the sun set. The sky was full of purple, green, and orange clouds. It was beautiful… so much so that I held onto Kiba's hand tightly and pointed.

He nodded and then pulled me into his lap holding me tightly. I leaned back knowing this chance to indulge in his warmth may never happen again. I listened to his slow even breaths then gasped aloud then he ran a hand down my thigh.

"Wha-What are you doing?" I asked him softly. He kissed my neck and continued running his hand up my thigh till he was right there at my underwear.

"I thought it was obvious." His voice said cockily. I got out of his arms then and sat the farthest I could from him. He just leaned up to me and held a bit of my hair in his hands. "I thought you wanted me to want you." Kiba smiled smugly.

I glared at him and then looked out the window again. "That's not what I want. Not in the least." I growled and then closed my eyes allowing my thoughts to take over. Memories of being all alone with just servant to entertain me… these were the memories that hurt the most. I couldn't even get close to those servants because they were switched out every two months.

No one has ever stayed with me. All I want is to no longer be alone. I change this all. Please… please God, give me someone who will stay by me forever… I turned to Kiba as the doors opened for us to get out. I held my hand out towards him with the warmest look I could make.

"Let's hang out at the bridge tomorrow, the one near my house. It'll be good for us both to be there." I said and then put my hands behind my back holding them there with my intertwined fingers. He looked at me with a confused expression then nodded.

It's time.


	5. Chapter 5

_The world seems so large now... and scary. i shivered lightly and tried not to cry anymore. I need to find a way to make a place for myself here in this huge world. No matter what I have to do this. _

We've been together for six months to be exact. In all that time he has never truly cared about me. With a little investigating I found out just how tight my parents made his situation. If he even made me cry then everyone in his entire family, group of friends, and work place would lose their jobs and houses. There was no wiggle room at all.

Sasori and I were in a little café a few cities from the place where I live. "What are you going to do?" He asked with no emotion as he drank his green tea. I shrugged knowing the only thing I can do. Sasori put his hand on mine and began to play with my fingers.

It seemed laid back but it was obvious after a moment that he was analyzing them. "You're an artist." I stated simply. He looked up at my face and nodded with a sly smile. I could feel something in my chest warm but I ignored it.

"From your hands I can tell that you are a healer." He murmured and kissed my palm. I stared at him for a moment then cupped my chin with my other palm and stared outside watching the clouds slowly pass over the crystal blue sky.

"I want to become a doctor one day." I replied blandly wondering why we're even here to begin with. He had invited me to talk but I should have said no. Talking with someone who is employed to your family seems wrong. I wonder why I bothered.

A reporter noticed me outside the window and began taking pictures, I ignored him. "Do you always get so much publicity?" Sasori asked with a hint of annoyance in his voice. The man let go of my hand and narrowed his eyes at the reporter who was now on the phone with an excited look.

I rolled my eyes and stood up. I picked up my French vanilla coffee and swiftly swallowed the rest before leading him out through the back of the café. He smiled softly at this and squeezed my hand. With a determined expression I ran though the alley ready to catch the reporter off guard. When I got to where he was I got ready to tackle him.

Instantly Sasori grabbed me from around the waist and held my right wrist keeping my fist from hitting him. He forced me down the way keeping me at a safe but close distance. The man is good at restraining me. "Your parents would be pissed if I let you run wild on that brat." Sasori informed me.

I grumbled incoherently about what a jerk he is, but Sasori just ignored me. I noticed something odd on one of the magazine racks we were beginning to pass by. It was just an average stand with several magazines. On one of them it had a picture of me and Kiba then a picture of Kiba and Ino. The caption said 'cheating on the millionaires or are they sharing?'

I glared and ignored how much happier Kiba looked with Ino then me. "Idiot." Sasori scowled as he looked at the magazine with me. I laughed and elbowed him lightly in the stomach. He just gave me a soft but warm smile and set me down.

"What do you want to do?" I asked and crashed where I was laying down on the sidewalk. He looked down at me with a glare. I could tell he expected better than me. I just pouted and tried not to let him see how tired I really am. I'm just done.

Kiba doesn't love me.

"I have an idea." He said blankly and took my hand and walked quickly through the crowd toward a skate park downtown. He didn't strike me as the skating type but when we got there I realized what he was planning on showing me.

Under the highway at the skate park, the actual highway stand was covered completely in a huge mural of spray paint. The picture was of a girl with pink hair and green eyes holding out her hand to a shadowed man while someone was trying to wrap their arms around her waist. It didn't show who. I smiled widely and pointed at it.

"That's amazing!" I cried happily rushing over to the mural pressing my hand against the painting. A boy with long blond hair came over with a smirk on his face.

"So the mural lady is real, yeah." He grinned making Sasori glare at him. I laughed at this and traced her pursed lips on the wall. "I'm Deidara, un. Who're you?"

"Sakura Haruno." I answered not really paying attention to him. I was too busy examining the painting. Deidara pouted as Sasori laughed.

"No competition finally." Sasori mused with a grin as he wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed my neck. I didn't pay attention to what he was doing and was busy focusing on the artwork.

"Who did this?" I asked causing both boys to look at me blankly before Deidara burst out laughing. Sasori scowled and let me go turning away. Deidara placed his arm around my shoulders and grinned.

"Sasori did it a while back, yeah. He comes here every once in a while to freshen up the artwork a bit or add something new. I'm surprised he hasn't invited you here before, un."Deidara smiled kindly. I looked up at the painting then glanced back at Sasori.

"You're an amazing artist." I said softly with a look of wonder. Sasori just shook his head.

"I have to fix the hands. They're strong but delicate. I didn't display that well enough." He explained pointing to the points where there was an apparent error. I didn't see anything wrong but whatever. It's his painting not mine.

"Okay. You do that. While you are I have to go. Tomorrow I have to talk to Kiba." I said simply and turned to go.

"She's taken." Sasori explained to Deidara softly making the blond pout sadly.


	6. Chapter 6

We met at the bridge outside the park, and instantly began walking. It was a simple outing, something we've gotten used to for the last six months. I accepted this and yet I still found a way to think this is wrong and we shouldn't be doing this. That's when I realized everything just as we got to the park.

I tried so hard. I gave up everything just to make him happy. All that I've worked for in my entire life has been wasted. I knew as soon as I saw his face that it was over. He kept pushing and pushing himself to accept me and this and now it's all over. I stared up at Kiba's smile and happy expression then looked down at his hand in mine.

"Stop!" I cried feeling the pain begin to fill my entire being. He looked at me with his shocked expression then blinked at me in confusion. I felt the tears build up in my eyes. I'm unable to do anything to make him happy. I'm not the one who's meant to be with him. "I'm done with this. Please just go with Ino." I said looking down at the ground at his black shoes and blue jeans.

"What are you talking about?" He asked with no emotion at all. This hurt even more. The pain inside my heart was almost as though it were a physical pain. All this work and devotion… it was all just a waste. I stared up at him with so much anger and bitterness that I wanted to scream and run away.

"My family won't do anything to you. You love _her_ go back to that girl! She loves you and you love her! Just go and leave me alone!" I shouted angrily thrusting my arm out violently causing Kiba to take a step back with a face full of bitter understanding. He nodded and let his hair cover his eyes.

I wanted him to tell me that I was _wrong_ and that he did love me. I wanted him to be my prince charming and _help_ me. He was _supposed_ to be there for me and _care_. This was all what he was _supposed_ to be. My prince, guardian, and lover; but he **never** could be that for me. In the end my prince was in love with someone else, and he was never mine…

"Thank you, Sakura." He whispered then turned around and ran. I watched him go as I fell to my knees and cried. The tears poured down my face in the middle of the park. I knew I was being ridicules. My family wanted him to marry me because he would suit our family and I love him. I _can't_ stand it.

I stood up then and glared at the sky defiantly. I need to get out of here and figure out what to do. The pain of loneliness and bitterness filled me. I could barely _hold_ myself together walking back to the Haruno mansion let alone _pull_ myself together. It's impossible with him gone. The man I loved.

"What's wrong with you?" A voice asked rudely from behind me. I turned to see a boy with deep messy red hair and light orange eyes. I glared at him and turned away heading toward the mansion ignoring his presence. It was Sasori. I'm done with him. I don't want to see the waiter at a time like this. It's not right.

Kiba's been trying so hard to make me happy. The boy even kissed me! How could he give me something as precious as a kiss if… if he loved another girl? I accidently let out a sob causing me to freeze. The world turned into a darkness I'd never noticed before. A dark cruel world that was because of me is what I've created.

"I almost destroyed true love." I whispered to myself with anger dripping in my voice. Anger and so many other stupid emotions I don't deserve to have. The boy continued following me from behind. I would stop and turn around yet he'd still be there following me. "I feel like one of the ugly stepsisters except in the end I had the guy but I gave him up to Cinderella because I realized the truth. He could never love me."

"You're an idiot aren't you?" He asked. I turned and glared at Sasori waiting for him to explain. He smirked and took a step forward, wiping my cheeks of my tears. "He would have fallen in love with you eventually. There's no way he couldn't have. Sometimes love takes time. You could have been Cinderella if you wanted to."

I stared at him with wide eyes then turned away and continued heading toward the castle- I mean my mansion. Sasori wasn't done with me yet, I could tell when he grabbed hold of my wrist. "Are you done with him?" He asked me with a dark expression. I could feel my eyes water as I clutched my stomach tightly with the arm that wasn't being held.

"Y-Yes." I choked out and watched him dark yet calculating eyes scan my position before he nodded. Sasori let my arm go and then turned and walked away. I watched him go for a moment. The servant boy was able to take away my pain like it was nothing.

I took a deep breath then fell to the ground once again and gasped. Instantly I wiped my eyes and smiled nice and wide. My phone began to ring making me look down. It was Ino.

"Hello?" I asked.

"Sakura, thank you so much for all you've done!"

"No problem! I just hope you two are happy!" I cried pretending to be happy when I'm not feeling anything right now except confusion and bitter regret.

"We are… and I just wanted to let you know that I owe you one. Anything you want."

I stared at the phone in shock. She knows I'll keep her to that. No matter what… she owes me. BIG TIME.

Because I almost died today.


	7. Chapter 7

I laid in bed and just stared at the ceiling. I don't know how long I did this for but I just know that I did and it felt like I did this for three lifetimes. How could this happen to me? I sat up slowly and decided that it hurt. A lot. This stabbing feeling inside my chest hurts me more than I could have ever imagined. I didn't think love hurt.

The loneliness has just gotten worse. I had thought that Kiba could finally be the one to take it away but I guess not. Maids, cooks, and servants came into my room. I flashed them all smiles and sent them on their way knowing how much my parents would harm Kiba if they found out how upset it makes me to lose him.

I got up slowly and walked into the bathroom to take a shower. The heat trailed down my body giving me some feeling I've needed for a while. It was as though there was something huge and pointed in my chest that wants to come out… almost as though I'm holding my breath to keep it in but somehow I've forgotten how to let out that air that will release whatever it is inside of me.

When I got out I threw on a white robe and walked out the door ready to be out of my room. It's betrayed me. If I had never seen Kiba within its walls then that room would be my haven but instead it is my hell. I let out another choked breath and sat down in the dining hall. My parents are out today. They could be shopping in Paris, doing business in Germany, or down at the local starbucks for all I know.

I forced myself to eat some raspberry sherbert ice cream. It was delicious of course but it didn't fill the hole in my chest. Something can but I don't know what. I glared at the wall and forced down the food knowing this isn't what I want right now.

Instantly Sasori entered the room. I looked at him blankly then felt the tears well up as the maid brought some lemon sherbert as well. The maid looked at me as though I were broken and she didn't know how to fix me. Sasori smirked at this and walked forward.

"She's just so excited to see the ice cream. Don't worry about it. Once she takes a bite the tears will probably stop." He informed her causing the maid to nod nervously before leaving. I glared at him darkly.

"That's very funny." I spat and wiped my eyes before trying to think of something to say. He looked at the large tubs of ice cream in amusement.

"Do I sense a movie marathon coming up? Hopefully not romances. Doesn't that just make the pain worse?" He asked with a shrug. I glared at him then got up ready to punch him but then uncontrollable sobs took over and I was hugging his shirt tightly while staining it with my tears. "Great, you're emotional."

I ignored him as the pain washed over me once again. I heard him tell the maid to do something but I didn't hear him. Instantly a slow song came on. It was 'Passenger Seat' by Death Cab For Cutie. He swayed me from left to right allowing me to be a lazy dancer but enjoy the feel of it all the same.

My eyes dried as I stared up at him in shock. This is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me… including Kiba. This made me pause for a moment then smile to myself. I like Sasori even if he is a bit odd and shows up at the weirdest times. At least I know he's always here for me even if I don't choose for him to be.

He pulled me closer and kissed me on the lips. I let him and closed my eyes resting my head on his chest. This feels peaceful… like I'm at home. My eyes felt so heavy it was relaxing knowing they were closed and didn't have to strain themselves any longer. When I woke up I was lying under the covers in my bed.

I glanced over to see Sasori looked down at me with a bored expression. I glared at him and decided that I might as well ignore him and go back to sleep. Instead I found myself opening my mouth to say something. Glaring harder, I closed my lips tightly and closed my eyes hoping I wouldn't ask such a stupid question.

"Tell me now before I force it out of you with trivial facts about a new hot romance down the block." Sasori said sounding bored. We both knew he was playing dirty. I've been crying my heart out about it all day and now he wants to rub it in my face if I don't inform him of the stupid question that I wanted to know the answer to.

"I just wanted to ask why you came." I growled angrily and sat up in bed making sure to give him my best scowl. Sasori blinked in surprise then straightened out my hair as he smiled softly. I didn't know what to make of it so I ignored the casual touch and waited for his explanation wanting to know and then kick him out of my place.

Sasori leaned forward then, with half closed eyes and whispered slyly, "I wanted to see you in a mess and keep that image in my head along with the others. I've got quite a collection, love." I blushed scarlet and hid my face under the covers so that this one wouldn't be added. Instantly he was on top of me with just the blanket separating us.

"Come on… that look has gotta be priceless… let me see it!" Sasori growled. His voice scared me because it was playful.


	8. Chapter 8

**Thank god for summer right? I'll do my best to update a lot but I'm not sure since i'll be busy being all over the states. Still, this week alone I have updated a ton so no complaints please!**

I watched him leave and hugged myself tightly. Sasori likes me, he's nice, and always there. What's wrong with this picture? Okay so he's a commoner, used to work for my parents, and hangs out with a guy who likes bombs. Kiba was a commoner too but he had good kind company and never worked for my family. Ugh none of this even matters all that much. I should probably go out traveling and allow myself some time to understand what's going on within myself. However cheesy that sounds I don't care so much.

"Maybe I should go to... some pointless place where no one knows me and allow my parents to be disappointed in me." I said slowly then quickly decided on a random state. I told some maids to pack my bags while I got some cash out of my piggy bank under my bed. It's full of hundred doller bills. I broke it open and took several bills then shoved them in my pocket. "I'll see you guys when I get back." I said quickly and headed out. I took my dark red mercedes keys and gasped aloud when I saw Sasori waiting by my car with a smirk on his face.

"I knew you would run away." He said simply and watched as I shoved my bags into the trunk and hopped into the car with the top down. "Can I at least come with you? I have my own money and I know more people in Texas then you do."

I stared at him in shock then glared. "How did you know I was going to Texas?" I asked angrily wanting to know how he can figure me out so easily. He rolled his eyes and smiled to himself. I watched in curiosity wondering why he acts like this around me.

"You had that look that said you wanted to run away just before I left, then you decided that putting on a cowgirl hat would make it impossible for me to figure out where you're going. You do realize most texans don't wear those hats right?" Sasori asked sounding incredibly amused.

"Shut up and leave me alone! I don't want to see you anymore!" I growled out wanting to strangle this jerk. He just smirked and crossed his arms.

"Did you know that if you own a house in texas and shoots someone on that property then its not illegal." He informed me with a look of childlike amusement. I'm tired of him laughing at me like this! He's treating me like I'm a little kid when I'm _so_ much better than him! My family is filthy rich! I can buy anything I could ever want! All I have to do is tell a guy my name and he'll be mine! But wait... that's not true is it? Not with Kiba.

"Don't look so sad. You'll make me want to hurt him." Sasori said softly and hugged me. We were just three feet from the car. If we get inside then we can drive for the thirty-two hours it takes to get there from Washington state. I let him hold me as I thought about it. If I give myself up to Sasori will he ever leave me? Is this real or is he just a better actor than Kiba?

"You can come with me if you make sure I have a good time." I grumbled making him laugh and pull me into the car. He took the driver's seat and started it up while we put on our seatbelts. I can imagine being with this man forever but I'm not sure if that'll work. Loneliness hit me like it had never been left. What if... after everything I give him and all the time I spend with Sasori... what if he leaves me?

I brushed away the thought and watched the scenery slowly change around us. At some point Sasori put on some piano play. It was sad but still good in a way. I don't typically listen to music with someone else so it was interesting being in the car with a young man who likes the same things as me when it comes to musical taste. I closed my eyes and let the wind blow back my hair while we continued down the road.

"Why do lonely people run away so much?" Sasori asked me softly. I looked over at him and then closed my eyes once more thinking about my answer carefully before I speak and tell him my own opinion. Finally I looked away and spoke.

"I believe it's because... when you are lonely you don't want anyone around you. It's almost as though people are no good anymore. No matter how close you get to someone there's never the definite chance of whether or not they'll like you, listen to you, or understand anything about you at all. Sometimes its better off being lonely by yourself then with a hoard of people around you." I explained letting the silence take over once more.

I could practically hear his mind work around that thought. It's something I believe but never really told anyone. Being someone like me, I have so many chances to meet new people but no matter how many I meet none of them really understand. No one can wrap their minds around my opinions, thoughts, or ideas. It's as though I'm just an extra picture added to a frame. A picture of a tear drop, the shadow of the true portrait of a lovely garden where people are happy and having fun. It's stupid and pointless but that's where I am.

"Too bad." Sasori murmured, before we headed into the next state.


	9. Chapter 9

When I got back home with Sasori my parents were waiting in the foyer. They looked angry and possibly upset but when they saw me with a man they seemed to cool down just a bit. I smirked at them and hugged his arm to me. Sasori just smiled and kissed my forehead. The best way to hook up with someone is over vacation.

"How are you?" My mother asked with no emotion. I looked at her for a moment in annoyance knowing she wants to know if we're engaged. I have to get married soon since my pretty face won't last forever. As their successor they need to know that I'm a safe bet. If Sasori and I don't get married then to them… this was all a waste of time.

"I'm good. How about you Sasori?" I asked him curiously in slight concern because he was a bit tense. The redhead looked down at me with a soft expression.

"I'm fine." He smiled and allowed me to cling to him. We went over this beforehand. If Sasori and I get married, we get the money of this family. If we get married… then he's free to be with me and go wherever with me. If we get married… then my loneliness will go away.

The feeling of loneliness has to end now.

"Are you two…" My father paused and hesitated as he looked between us. I smiled at him.

"We're getting married." I answered and held up my left hand. It had a beautiful ring that swirled several different colors in the light. It was expensive and is so beautiful! The ring has been passed down in his family for so many years! He entrusted me, a lonely and pitiful girl, to this amazing ring!

Once my parents left Sasori turned to me with a sad smile. I looked up at him bitterly and waited for him to tell me the truth. We didn't discuss this that much at all… and frankly I don't know if he loves me. I just know that if I'm going to marry someone soon I'd rather marry a stranger like Sasori then a stranger I don't know at all.

"You don't love me do you?" He asked me point blank. I looked down knowing it's true. I don't know him at all.

"No I don't. Do you love me?" I asked in return. He smiled and ran a hand through my hair making me stop breathing. No… he can't! It's impossible! We haven't known each other for that long at all!

"I don't love you." He answered and kissed me on top of the head. We shared a secret smile knowing this is going to work out just fine. We'll get married, have kids, run the business the best we can, then grow old together without ever getting a divorce because that would be wrong. We may grow to love each other eventually but right now it's a no.

We held the other's hand tightly and tried to take in as many deep breaths as possible before we have to go. Before we have to face our fate and see them.

"Let's do this." He whispered in my ear then led me to my parent's office. The wedding plans were set almost instantly and everyone of my friends were invited along with his own friends. We tell everyone that we love each other knowing it's a sweet little lie. This is the best way for us to escape the feeling of loneliness.

A little over twelve years later…

I hurried after him as Sasori waited impatiently by the car. "When we were younger I was able to drive here in one night by myself." He growled out as I laughed at him.

"Well we're not young anymore. I'm going to help you so that we don't get into a wreck." I smiled and put little Haru into the car. We've been married for twelve years now and have an eight year old girl. We're going on a family trip to Washington but have to stop in Wyoming first. It'll take almost 24 hours. But we won't mind.

Once we were on our way with little Haru fast asleep in the car I turned to Sasori. "I love you." I informed him seriously. He looked at me for a moment then smirked and took my hand.

"I love you too." He answered softly. We both looked ahead at the stars and the empty road. It made me think of how lonely we had been in the beginning and how he just happened to always be there for me when I needed him. Back then it was only a puppy crush. That was all we had for the other.

"When did we fall in love?" I asked curiously. Sasori opened his mouth to answer making me punch him and laugh once more. We're good together now. We fit.

"I think I like this." I said softly and thought about us being in a happy marriage for a long time. Sasori laughed at me and continued to head out. It's nice when you lose the loneliness within you. I smiled once more at him and tried to think of something to do while we drive.

"Do you even know how long I liked you for?" Sasori asked sounding a bit angry. I looked at him blankly then began to think. I guess if I want to get this right I have to be as accurate as possible…

"As soon as Kiba and I broke up!" I declared excitedly making my husband glare out the window.

"No you idiot. I liked you when we met at your birthday party. I didn't know it was yours until you started opening presents and such but I liked you then. Didn't think I'd do anything except maybe have sex with you in a closet." Sasori said making me laugh.

"I'm kidding." He growled angrily. I smiled at him and he found himself smiling back. When loneliness fades… what exactly remains?


End file.
